According to a (relatively) recent USA Today article, Boston's own beloved Dunkies is planning to arm itself with stale munchkins (Do you know how hard munchkins get after a few days? Someone could lose an eye.) and invade Krispy territory, leaving a swath of glazed carnage in its wake.Out of the goodness of my cold Northeastern heart, I have compiled a helpful list of tips for those lucky people who will soon be entering a Dunkin' Donuts for the first time. Don't thank me. That powdered sugar on your chin is thanks enough.
1) If you think the service is bad, you're right. It's not just a temporary problem while the new stores get up and running. Best to think of it as an opportunity to get the true Boston experience.
2) 1 Dunkin' donut = 1/8 Krispy Kreme. This means that you can eat 8 Dunkin' donuts for each Krsipy Kreme you would normally consume. At least, that's how I look at it.
3) The pumpkin muffins are seasonal, like the Shamrock Shake. Plan accordingly.
4) No matter what the big orange sign in the window says, the D+D cappucino is only one small step up from that machine they have at 7/11
5) If you want your coffee without sugar, you have to say "no sugar." If you don't specify, you will get a beverage that tastes like Rhode Island's official state drink.
6) The perfect hangover cure: 1 egg and cheese on a croissant; 1 Boston cream; 1 Great One. Low-fat muffins will only exacerbate your symptoms.
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